Badfic!

OH GODS TOO MANY TROPES MAKE IT STOP!

Thu, 31 May 2012 18:28:33 +1000

OH GODS TOO MANY TROPES MAKE IT STOP!

magesmagesmages: Ok, so a couple of things. ONE: THOR YOU ARE A...

Thu, 31 May 2012 17:41:33 +1000

Ok, so a couple of things. ONE: THOR YOU ARE A JERK, he was walking and everything you didn’t need to shove him. TWO: What does Tony have in that case??? WHAT DOES TONY HAVE IN THE CASE???

EDIT: Oh hang on, that’s the tesseract. WHY DID THEY TRUST TONY WITH THE TESSERACT?

I love how everyone’s all just, like, strollin’ up real casual like in their civvies from all different directions in the middle of a public place doo doo doo nothing to see here guys just ignore the BIZARRE SPACE GODS what bizarre space gods? Who are you guys? I’ve never met you guys before. Avengers? Never heard of them.

randomredux: janiejanine replied to your post: Watching the X-Files on Netflix; love David...

Thu, 31 May 2012 17:38:02 +1000

randomredux:

janiejanine replied to your post: Watching the X-Files on Netflix; love David Duchovny.

….That’s a brilliant idea. If those fics exist, I want to read all of them.

Haha thanks XD I kind of want to write it, and I know fuck all about writing fanfic, lol. But I love crossovers.

The trick to writing fanfic is… just to write fanfic.

Seriously.

All fanfic is idfic, written for the pleasure of the writer. If other people like it… bonus! If they don’t… well screw them who cares what they think anyway. (Losers.) :P

nick fury: hey i just met ya'll

Thu, 31 May 2012 13:42:48 +1000

nick fury: hey i just met ya'll
nick fury: and this is crazy
nick fury: but i need y'all egocentric motherfuckers to stop whatever you're doing to join my super secret boy band and avenge the earth because thor's brother is attention-whoring from space.
nick fury: so call me maybe

paranoidnebula: If you do a Loki redemption fic right, you get something rather like...

Thu, 31 May 2012 09:07:52 +1000

paranoidnebula:

If you do a Loki redemption fic right, you get something rather like this:

Yo.

:)　

I’ll try and fit the coffee enema into a future installment. Don’t ever say I’m nothing if not obliging.

"Magic Missile sure was a lot less destructive when they were just rolling d4."

Wed, 30 May 2012 15:58:36 +1000

“Magic Missile sure was a lot less destructive when they were just rolling d4.”

- NEEDS MOAR NERD JOKES!

Every time I write about "emanating cold", a physicist cries.

Wed, 30 May 2012 15:49:28 +1000

The problem with Old Norse is that too many of the words just sound like English.

Tue, 29 May 2012 18:11:25 +1000

Makes it hard to sound badassly mysterious, sometimes.

morefunthanislegal93: Mysterious, Malicious, Murderer,...

Tue, 29 May 2012 16:08:34 +1000

morefunthanislegal93:

Mysterious, Malicious, Murderer, Monster

Relevant! (Though technically unrelated! I used “maniac” instead of “malicious”, and only had three. But you know how it is. Loki loves ‘literation and all.)

The modern Jotun's guide to heel-face turning.

Tue, 29 May 2012 15:38:51 +1000

In comments on ALIMoM, one of the things that comes up a lot — probably 100% unsurprisingly — is the likelihood that MCU!Loki will get some kind of at least nominal canon heel-face turn in the future. I mean, let’s face it: He pretty much sucks as a villain. When a good portion of the fandom appears to find you more sympathetic than your main rival, not even killing a beloved character can dissuade them, and even your actor apparently thinks you just need hug and some self-esteem, you know something’s up.

Well, as it turns out, TVTropes — that time-waster of all time-wasters — just-so happens to have a handy guide on exactly this issue! Let’s have some fun with numbers:

The MCU!Loki Heel-Face Turn Calculation Worksheet:

Species: At worst a 3, but as the universe’s apparently only Asgardian Jotun, more likely a 5.
Gender: 2. He’s a doode (this ain’t the comics).
Age: A technical 4 (again, this ain’t the comics).
Role: In Thor arguably a 1 (he’s the Big Bad, insofar as that film has one), but by the events of The Avengers a definite 4, as that film’s Dragon.
Aesthetics: Nominally a 2 (for the Jotun thing) but let’s face it, this is really a 4 or even — if some of fanart on Tumblr is to be believed — a rare male 5.
Motivation: In Thor, pretty much the definition of 5. By The Avengers, either a 3 or, potentially, still a 5, depending on how certain scenes are interpreted.
Characterization: This one is tough, since I think there’s a slight disconnect between how the character is written (and/or intended to be recieved) and how he’s acted. You could probably make an argument for any point from 1 to 5, so let’s just split the difference and go with 3.
Contentness: Again, debatable. Thor is definitely a 5, you can maybe argue Loki’s gotten more into his Evil Stride by the time we see him in Avengers, but even then I think you’d have to struggle to get lower than a 3. He certainly seems to like spending time with the heroes moreso than his own side (which Fury explicitly points out), if nothing else. And if his flashback/vision/whatever scene when on Mook Supervision Duty is anything to go by, it’s not hard to understand why (see also Motivation, above).
Morality of the story: This one is kinda tough for me to decide, mostly because of my general dislike for the superhero genre. So on the one hand, you’ve got your standard black and white superhero world (2). On the other hand, this is Marvel (3). On the other other hand, pretty much no-one is evil “just because” (5). Then again, that’s not counting Thanos, and sometimes prophecies are self-fulfilling (4). 3 or 4 seems most likely, but I’d be open to argument.
Idealism of the story: I think you’d have a hard time arguing this is anything other than a 5 (or, well, intended to be anything other than a 5, YMMV).

Adding up the scores as per the Hugely Scientific TVTropes Method results in a 60% to 94% probability that Loki will heel-face turn in a future MCU film (the low end is, obviously, taking all the worst-case scores, the high end… isn’t; it’s also worth noting this mixes his continuity, as well).

More importantly than what actually happens, however, is that this is why audiences find the guy so sympathetic. Tropes are a measure of the pop culture zeitgeist, and the reason tables like the Sorting Algorithm Of Heel-Face Turning exist is because that’s what audiences are used to seeing. Whether people consciously realise it or not, the reason people read Loki as sympathetic is because he exhibits all the traits we’re taught to see as sympathetic.

So. Prediction time! Since I like to cover all my bases, I think we’re going to see one of three outcomes. And to make sure that’s not just a total cop-out, I’ll include the reason why:

Played straight: Loki heel-face turns, at least for a little while. The most likely reason at the moment would seem to be an Enemy Mine/Mistreatment-Induced Betrayal/Even Evil Has Standards moment, resulting him teaming up at least nominally with the heroes against Thanos. (It’s hard to be the King of Asgard/Earth when everything in the universe is dead, including you, as Lex Luthor frequently learns.) Bonus points in this scenario is that it can be temporary, and be turned into yet another Kick the Dog or just flat-out character development moment. If Loki walks out morally ambiguous or even heroic (not unprecedented), then Badass Decay is inevitable.
HAR HAR! SCREW YOU, FANGIRLS!: Nah, he’s just bad. Both the Moral and the Despair Event Horizons are so far back they’re not even visible, and now the whole universe is going to suffer the consequences (or maybe just Thor). I hope you like holding the Villain Ball, Loki, because this is your eternal fate in this scenario.
… wait. What do you mean he’s sympathetic?: And this is the third option, a massive, massive case of author failure. The most likely cause of this is Protagonist-Centered Morality and/or Strawman Has a Point, as in the original Thor film where said title character really is a dick, by virtue of that being the plot. (In fact, if you think about it from Loki’s point of view — as opposed to the viewers’ — he’s had an entire Asgardian-length lifetime of putting up with his brother being a bratty moron, so it’s kinda reasonable that he’s not super-convinced Thor’s three-day-ish “exile” is really the effective on the Learning a Lesson front.) This is related to the above — in that the net result is Loki stays evil — except the rationale and/or potential end result is different. Author-failure!Loki is more likely to turn into a For The Evulz Card Carrying Villain, primarily for the rationale that that’s how he’s “supposed” to be, actual character development be damned.

For the record, I think the original Thor fell into #3, while The Avengers pulled back to more of a #2. I’d expect future canon to be either #2 or #3, depending on the writer. #3 scenarios in particular are interesting, because I think they show the inherent danger of having oblivious authors who play life on the lowest difficulty setting (something chronically common in comics), and who think that portraying alternate scenarios as ending in tragic villainy equals “pathos”. This is particularly bad in Thor: The designated hero is blond, from the dominant race, and interested in Manly Things (Thor establishes the Asgardians as being explicitly sexist very early on in the film, thanks Thor) like violence and women and smashing. The designated villain, by contrast, is dark-haired, from a different race, and interested in strategy and talking and magic. Both of them are, at the start of the film, unlikable albeit for different reasons. Thor is an entitled brat prone to temper tantrums and violence. Loki is a needy brat prone to brooding and vindictiveness. Both have a go at genocide. Both are flawed, but one is socially included, because he fits the dominant cultural paradigm, while the other isn’t (Loki doesn’t seem to have his own social circle, and Thor’s friends barely tolerate him), because he doesn’t. There’s quite a nasty undercurrent of Fantastic White Man’s Burden, Have You Tried Not Being a Monster and passing privilege going on throughout the film, too: We’re supposed to see Odin as “the good guy” for raising a Jotun baby “as an Asgardian” except, well… you can insert your own real-life equivalent scenario here and see what you feel about it.

The point being: For anyone who’s ever been part of any minority group that’s ever been excluded from any part of mainstream society, Loki’s can’t-have-a-forst-giant-on-the-throne-of-Asgard speech to Odin in Thor is just a bit too close to home. Especially since Odin’s response is essentially to have a fainting spell, shifting the focus of the story back onto the Áspain (this is like manpain, except when Asgardians get it) because shut up minority groups everyone is sick of your whining.¹ At best, Thor plays Loki’s story as a kind of Aesop of the dangers of being mean to marginalised groups. But it plays it for the benefit of the privileged, who get to feel both, a) relieved that they have privilege, and b) relatively unchallenged since, yanno, Loki was evil after all on account of being born a monster and we tried hard but what can you do amirite?

Ouch.

Fortunately, Avengers dials this down a fair bit, essentially by making Loki’s motivations… well, basically he doesn’t really have any beyond a vague “I’m evil because fuck you that’s why MWAHAHAHAHA oh and also maybe blah blah torture blah blah my brother is a dick but whatever MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!”.² Because Fuck You That’s Why is a way better Start of Darkness than People Were Mean to Me Because I’m Different, particularly if, a) you are the sort of person who has, in fact, had experience with people being mean to you because you were different, and b) one of the Mean Kids is on Team Hero.³

There. I said it. Are you listening to me, writers? It’s better for your villain to have no motivation at all for being evil than to make their motivation based on their status as a member of a marginalised group, even a made-up one. There are two exceptions. The first is if you plan on heel-face turning said character, but this is contingent on having them find a way to come to peace with their own difference, rather than having them “assimilated” into being “normal” (kids’ films, of all things, seem to be much better at this than any other genre… though usually only if you’re male). The second exception is the fun exception, which is essentially to have your villain come to terms with his or her issues in a mature, adult way… then still decide to be evil anyway because Fuck You That’s Why!! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

This is why I’d be more-or-less okay with an Option #2 on the list above, but only if it’s done in the context of… sort of forgetting that the events in Thor occurred. Thor is a great set-up for a #1. Taken as a stand-alone film, Avengers works as an acceptable precursor to a #2 (though there’s still that whole cringe-worthy “insane = evil” thing going on).

But, let’s face it. We’re probably going to get a #3.

Bring on the fanfic.

¹ Before anyone asks: Do I think Loki is awash in frosty Jotunpain? OMG is he ever. Do I think this scene is an example of it? No. Do I think every man in Asgard is a huge coddled baby with coping issues? Holy shit yes, but with a role model like Odin No-The-Stress-Is-Too-Much-Bring-On-The-Fainting-Couch Borson, who can blame them?

² FWIW, I saw Avengers before Thor, and if you don’t have the context of the latter film, this is pretty much how the former reads. Honestly, it kinda reads like that anyway I think, but definitely if this is the first time you see these characters.

³ Nebulous feels of being “sorry” on behalf of Mean Hero don’t count, because they’re more about affirming Mean Hero’s status as A Good Guy than anything else. Because he said sorry! What kind of monster doesn’t accept a sorry? Well, in the Really Real World we call this a “fauxpology”, and Thor gives a perfect example of one to Loki in Thor. The dick.

hilarion: So in the season 2 finale Ned Stark will come back to...

Tue, 29 May 2012 13:53:23 +1000

hilarion:

So in the season 2 finale Ned Stark will come back to life as THE NORSE GOD OF THUNDER AND SMITE ALL OF WINTERFELL’S ENEMIES ON THE WAY TO THE IRON THRONE

… OMG.

So here's your Marvel/Norse Mythology trivia of the day:

Tue, 29 May 2012 07:46:18 +1000

Odin’s name is related to the Old Norse word óðr. The meaning of this word?

Fury.

Trufax.

[Fanfic: Avengers] Y2h0aG9u 3/?

Mon, 28 May 2012 23:11:10 +1000

[Fanfic: Avengers] Y2h0aG9u 3/?:

Gods, they hadn’t checked it. Hadn’t been down to the lab since she’d bought Luke back from the airport. It was just space noise, it’d either be there or it wouldn’t, and they were recording every minute of it anyway. No point being there just to be there. They were going to look at it tomorrow, her and Luke. Try and figure it out.

Hey. Did I mention “Y2h0aG9u” is kinda a cosmic horror space zombie story? Because it totes is.

So I needed someone to do Computer Stuff in this chapter and sadly Jane had already established herself as “not Neo from the Matrix”. Sorry Jane. Maybe Loki took a GPEN bootcamp or something.

I also shoot Loki a lot in this series. I’m sure he’s getting sick of it by now. (Har har what are you going to do about it, Mr. Fictional? I’M AN AUTHOR I DO WHAT I WANT!)

Muse, “Starlight” Starlight I will be chasing the...

Sun, 27 May 2012 09:41:57 +1000

Muse, “Starlight”

Starlight
I will be chasing the starlight
Until the end of my life
I don’t know if it’s worth it anymore

Oh Muse. Stop making terrible emo teen nu-metal.

Or, not. You know we love you for it.

[Fanfic: Avengers] Y2h0aG9u 2/?

Sun, 27 May 2012 01:46:00 +1000

[Fanfic: Avengers] Y2h0aG9u 2/?:

It was the eyes, she thought. Wide and astonished, blinking up at her behind thick-framed glasses and a curtain of messy dark hair. Well, that and the t-shirt. White text on black proclaiming that What Happens in the BLACK HOLE… …stays in the BLACK HOLE. There was a picture and everything.

So I hope you guys like identity porn! Because here’s 4,700 words of it! With dialogue. A lot of dialogue. So much dialogue OMG.

Funfax this episode: That t-shirt is, indeed, real. As is the Viking fondness for chess and tafl. Whether or not dice were used in tafl is also a Big Question in History, mostly because we don’t actually have a full ruleset for Hnefatafl that’s survived. Meaning no-one knows how it’s played, exactly, which is why the rules are glossed over here. And I made up the bit about the dice.

I spent an inordinately long amount of time Googling to see whether it is, in fact, feasible to flick the top of a beer bottle off one-handed with a thumb. Cue people coming in to tell me Heinekens have twist-tops. Oi.

Also: Apparently California does have river salmon. Way to ruin my previously great opening there, nature!

"How does one get into theurgical xenoarchaeology, anyway?"

Sat, 26 May 2012 10:49:35 +1000

“How does one get into theurgical xenoarchaeology, anyway?”

- Putting “xeno-” in front of any field of science makes it sound 93.28383% more comic book worthy. Trufax.

Biggest problem in ALIMoM:

Sat, 26 May 2012 00:32:39 +1000

randomredux:

deefic:

randomredux:

deefic:

Want to make slash. Have no pairing.

(This has never happened before… I— I don’t know what to do.)

*cough*Movie-verse version of this guy?*cough*

C’mon man. I just made myself sit through Thor. Don’t make me watch Captain America too.

(Though, to be fair, I probably actually wouldn’t hate it as much, so…)

I’ll give the Captain America movie props for not at all hiding that his entire character was pretty much a propaganda tool; it was a better film than I expected.

Also, I ENJOY YOUR SUFFERING MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Yeah, Cap is pretty easy to deconstruct. Honestly nowadays I think it’d be harder to play him straight (a-har— no, not in that way) than not, q.v. how much Avengers skirted around/outright derided it.

(Even if his shield is made of FRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEDDDOOOOOOMMMM! Or, yanno. Government-subsidised faux-market capitalism in the form of the military-industrial complex.)

“Y2h0aG9u” teaser bought to you by… terrible...

Sat, 26 May 2012 00:28:15 +1000

“Y2h0aG9u” teaser bought to you by… terrible Muse songs! Hooray!

Biggest problem in ALIMoM:

Sat, 26 May 2012 00:20:49 +1000

randomredux:

deefic:

Want to make slash. Have no pairing.

(This has never happened before… I— I don’t know what to do.)

*cough*Movie-verse version of this guy?*cough*

C’mon man. I just made myself sit through Thor. Don’t make me watch Captain America too.

(Though, to be fair, I probably actually wouldn’t hate it as much, so…)

[Fanfic: Avengers] Y2h0aG9u 1/?

Sat, 26 May 2012 00:16:32 +1000

[Fanfic: Avengers] Y2h0aG9u 1/?:

They weren’t looking for aliens. Nowadays, no-one was. SETI had officially gone from quixotic dream to a terrifying liability six years ago, the day all of humanity had woken up to learn that, not only was it not alone, but that there were things out there that weren’t friendly. Not in the least.

Brain-bleach! Teaser for the actual “Epilogue” sequel. FWIW I do not actually intend to continue posting this in 1,000 word snippets; think of this as the “before the opening credits” bit of the episode.

Also! Not in second person. Wow. Amazing.

Apologies in advance to all astrophysicists (I know… quite a few, actually). Also, Jane now has a PhD, which I don’t believe she did in the film. Because fuck you that’s why.